For My Best Friend
I wrote the following exerpt this morning in answer to my best friend's email. We have been diet warriors for a very long time. Today is a day to reflect on our calming influences. My friend means everything to me and her friendship is one of the richest and most satisfying of my life.
I am so unbelievably proud of you. This is how you are going to get well- by processing and getting to the heart of why you are burying yourself under 80lbs of fat. All these feelings are interconnected, the loneliness, sadness, anxiety, fear, disgust anger, dismay and the like. A balanced life embraces the joy and despair with an equally sanguine attitude.
First and foremost, real love is unconditional. The piece I see lacking is that you forget you must love YOU unconditionally before you can complete a healthy relationship. You fall in love with someone by really getting to know them. Have you really gotten to know you without the gray glasses of discontent? My well of self esteem comes from a honest assessment of who I am. I love me, warts and all. I know I can be a complete pain in the ass, so what? I strive for balance, the odious bits of who I am weighed out equally by the lovely ones. Balance, not perfection. I do not expect myself to live up to other people's expectations of who and what I should be. I do not genuinely care if people like or get me. The fact a handful of people make the effort to do so, I'm grateful.
Someone told you at some point you were unworthy and lacking and "bad". Did it ever occur to you they were wrong or lied? Why are you choosing to believe bullshit from someone evil? Satan pulls that crap, making people feel unworthy, distorting truth, manipulating hearts to gain control. Look around, those of us that know you, love you dearly. My radar is pretty damn good and you know I see everything. Do you honestly think after all these years I would put up with someone not worth my time and energy? Seriously, you should know by now I can't do without you and if we ever ended our friendship there would be a crater in my chest where my heart is now and I can honestly say my grief would be boundless. I have never loved nor trusted a man the way I love and trust you.
May your girlfriends bring you peace, perspective and love you unconditionally. May you be well and healthy together.
Patti
p.s. Go Vikings! lol
I am so unbelievably proud of you. This is how you are going to get well- by processing and getting to the heart of why you are burying yourself under 80lbs of fat. All these feelings are interconnected, the loneliness, sadness, anxiety, fear, disgust anger, dismay and the like. A balanced life embraces the joy and despair with an equally sanguine attitude.
First and foremost, real love is unconditional. The piece I see lacking is that you forget you must love YOU unconditionally before you can complete a healthy relationship. You fall in love with someone by really getting to know them. Have you really gotten to know you without the gray glasses of discontent? My well of self esteem comes from a honest assessment of who I am. I love me, warts and all. I know I can be a complete pain in the ass, so what? I strive for balance, the odious bits of who I am weighed out equally by the lovely ones. Balance, not perfection. I do not expect myself to live up to other people's expectations of who and what I should be. I do not genuinely care if people like or get me. The fact a handful of people make the effort to do so, I'm grateful.
Someone told you at some point you were unworthy and lacking and "bad". Did it ever occur to you they were wrong or lied? Why are you choosing to believe bullshit from someone evil? Satan pulls that crap, making people feel unworthy, distorting truth, manipulating hearts to gain control. Look around, those of us that know you, love you dearly. My radar is pretty damn good and you know I see everything. Do you honestly think after all these years I would put up with someone not worth my time and energy? Seriously, you should know by now I can't do without you and if we ever ended our friendship there would be a crater in my chest where my heart is now and I can honestly say my grief would be boundless. I have never loved nor trusted a man the way I love and trust you.
May your girlfriends bring you peace, perspective and love you unconditionally. May you be well and healthy together.
Patti
p.s. Go Vikings! lol
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