Let's Get Our Lives Together!

There have been a few highlights of living at home again (most notably, more time with my sister!), and one of them has been a Sunday brunch club that she thought of. We call it the Let's Get Our Lives Together! club, and there are four of us - me (28, single, living at home, seeking employment); my sister Laura (a few weeks shy of 27, engaged, seeking employment); Liz (25, engaged, seeking employment); and Kim (30, lives with boyfriend, seeking employment). Obviously, the fact that we are all seeking employment (in 4 different professions, no less) is a major factor of discussion, but there are deeper things that will make it sustainable in the long run.

When Laura thought of it and we started discussing it, the immediate thing that came to mind was WHY DIDN'T WE THINK OF THIS SOONER. Here we are, 4 women with a lot going on in our lives, but for each of us there is at least one important thing missing and we can really help each other out. We work together on resumes, cover letters, and discussing the pros and cons of different graduate programs. The three of them have good, kind men who are supportive, but there's nothing like having women friends who can relate and provide support!

We created a chart, with 5 categories - career, health & beauty (all of us are trying to lose weight for weddings and general health), personal, finance and support (tasks to help each other). The socialization seriously gets me excited, as I have few friends here on Long Island and not much opportunity to make new ones at the moment. It's also nice to know that there is time carved out to be heard - what is said at brunch stays there, and it's a judgment-free zone.

An important bonus, though, is that there is some accountability - if I have something on that chart, I know I am going to be asked about it the following week. I respect these women too much to lie to them, even about something as small as weight watchers points and going to the gym. While we are kind and forgiving of each other, and they let me off the hook when I falter, there are only so many times one can play that card without feeling worse than you did before they knew about it.

Blogging about the Action Plan is thankfully similar. I have fallen off the wagon a number of times, and I've received incredible support and encouragement - and without being judged as harshly as I judge myself. I'm much more inclined to give things another shot than if I were seriously in this alone, and even though we aren't sitting together over brunch every week, I respect you too much to lie to you about when I falter, too.

Being a part of this community has been amazing, because there is a degree of accountability to a community of other women who reminded me that I was not the only person trying to juggle a lot, worried about many things, and feeling guilty for struggling. While I would never wish these types of challenges on someone, I also am not going to lie about the comfort in hearing "I feel the same way!!" at a time when it's most needed.

As we move forward into the 4th week, I've been thinking a lot about what will be sustainable and what will be more of a challenge for me. Consistency is still a huge problem for me, since I have super productive and healthy days back to back with days where I am essentially waste of space. I'll draft two or three blog entries at once, but get so distracted that I'll forget to actually post them in a timely manner and the next thing I know, it's Thursday or Friday again.

While I feel there is still a lot of room for improvement for me, I am doing a better job of acknowledging the progress that I've made so far. I am better at being more forgiving of myself, and focusing on my health and well-being. I've been on autopilot a little bit, despite efforts to be more mindful, but my main goal for this week is to try to be more consistent in the mindfulness and more conscious about what I can really carry forward with me.

No matter how successful I am at that or not, doing this has certainly been a positive experience that will stay with me after the next 7 days are over. I hope it's been the same for you, too!